Monthly Archives: March 2024

God Bless the USA Bible: The Holy Writ You Have to Get

Kierkegaard’s Ghost

(News that’s fake, but credible)

Kierkegaard’s Ghost is proud to announce our sponsorship of the newly minted God Bless the USA Bible. This addition of Holy Writ, promoted by President (some scurriously allege “former president”) Donald J. Trump, is like none other. Unlike all the incomplete versions that contain only such quaint and boring relics as the words of Jesus, the Ten Commandments, sermons of prophets and epistles of apostles, this Bible comes with a complete copy of the divinely inspired United States Constitution, Declaration of Independence and the Pledge of Allegiance to the Flag. It bears the stamp of its promoter who urges us to “Make America ‘Prey’ Again-you know, on those sweet young things. Grab ‘em by the p#$&*! We’ll make America safe again for our boys to be boys!” Donald J. Trump

This handsome imitation leather bound volume comes complete with color illustrations, redlining for the words of Jesus (as well as real estate), a centerfold featuring Stormy Daniels and one of her steamiest DVDs. All this can be yours for just $59.99. The God Bless the USA Bible is not available in any retail outlets.

What conservative evangelical leaders are saying about the God Bless the USA Bible:

“God’s word from the hand of God’s champion. You can’t get holier writ than that!” Rev. Franklin Graham.

“I love it! I especially liked the DVD. It was almost as good as watching it live.” Former Liberty University president Jerry Fallwell, Jr.

“It’s wonderful that we have a political leader who not only promotes but embodies family values like rape, adultry and fornication-hey, it’s all in the Bible. Biblical families did it.” Tony Perkins, president of the Family Research Council.

“This is a true white man’s Bible! Every single illustration paints the bible heroes white, including all three wise men and the Ethiopian Eunuch. Now that’s a replacement conspiracy I can get behind!” Tucker Carlson

Now folks, this Bible is a great deal, but that isn’t the only reason we need you to buy it. As you know, with several criminal indictments and a civil judgement of almost five billion dollars against Donald Trump, his re-election campaign is in deep financial trouble. We need you to help us replenish the coffers by making the God Bless the USA Bible a best seller. If Donald Trump loses, our country will be overrun with liberal, Marxist, God denying, America hating vermin. I know you don’t want that to happen! So help us keep Donald from going broke and America from going Wok. This fine Bible on your coffee table, in addition to supporting our dear leader, will let your snowflake neighbors and relatives know exactly where you stand.

BUT WAIT! There’s more. If you place your order within the next thirty days, we will also send you, free of charge, the latest model of the Make America Great Again baseball cap. This fine head piece, lovingly assembled by child laborers in the People’s Republic of China, comes with an aluminum foil lining to protect your brain from lame stream media propaganda, radioactive breezes from wind turbines and dangerous ideas from those books your kids keep bringing home from school. Don’t let the facts upset and confuse you. Better dead than read. “Life is fraughtless when you’re thoughtless.”

So what are you waiting for? Call, write or order your God Bless the USA Bible online now and get your free tin foil lined MAGA cap today while supplies last.

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FAKE NEWS ALERT: The above article is satirical. The events it describes didn’t happen.  “There are people who will say that this whole account is a lie, but a thing isn’t necessarily a lie even if it didn’t necessarily happen.” John Steinbeck

 

The Incomplete Gospel

RESURRECTION OF OUR LORD

Isaiah 25:6-9

Psalm 118:1-2, 14-24

1 Corinthians 15:1-11 or

Acts 10:34-43

Mark 16:1-8

Prayer of the Day: God of mercy, we no longer look for Jesus among the dead, for he is alive and has become the Lord of life. Increase in our minds and hearts the risen life we share with Christ, and help us to grow as your people toward the fullness of eternal life with you, through Jesus Christ, our Savior and Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and forever.

“So they went out and fled from the tomb, for terror and amazement had seized them; and they said nothing to anyone, for they were afraid.” Mark 16:8.  

So ends the gospel of Mark the Evangelist-or does it? To be sure, nearly all biblical scholars agree that the above sentence concludes the original gospel and that vss. 9-20 are later additions to that work. I assume that is why the makers of the lectionary exclude them from our gospel lesson for Easter Sunday. This raises two interesting questions. First, why does the Evangelist end the gospel on such an ambiguous and inconclusive note? Who is the young man dressed in white at the scene of the tomb? An angel? Perhaps, but the text does not say so specifically. Why does the Evangelist not include the resurrection appearances recorded in the other gospels? Did he not know about them? That seems unlikely. The gospel of Mark was written well after 70 C.E. But as our second lesson demonstrates, these accounts of encounters with the resurrected Jesus were commonly known throughout the church as early as 50-60 C.E. when Paul composed his letters. Was the end of the gospel “lost” or was Mark somehow prevented from completing it? That seems unlikely.[1] We are left, I believe, with the conclusion that Mark ended the gospel in precisely the way intended.

Secondly, then, what are we to make of the material in vss. 9-20? My New Testament professors in seminary urged us to ignore them. They are, after all, much later additions and thus further away in time from the “Christ event.” Moreover, they detract from the striking ending the Evangelist gives us and blunts its impact. Disciples of the historical critical method (HCM) as they were, they tended (whether intentional or not) to model an approach to the Bible based on skepticism. The gospels are, after all, not historical documents. They are theological works more concerned with the church’s claims about Jesus than Jesus himself and his teachings. If the way through the gospels to the true Jesus is already fraught, how much more these spurious addendums.

I believe biblical scholarship has left the HCM behind. So also have I. To be clear, I continue to value textual criticism, source criticism, redaction analysis, form criticism and all the other components of HCM. I believe it is important for us to understand how the Bible came to us. Thus, I have no problem with the “historical” and “critical” pieces of HCM. It is the “method” part I have come to reject. I do not view the Bible as a haystack through which one must sift to find the needle of relevant truth. However frustrating to our modernist sensibilities, the Bible is the oldest witness we have to the God of Israel and our Lord, Jesus Christ. So the real question is whether this messy, diverse and contradictory collection of narratives, poems, sermons, parables and sayings composed, written, edited and woven together over centuries of time and stemming from varying historical and cultural contexts manages to “get the God of Israel and Jesus right.” Neither HCM nor any other hermeneutical method can answer that question for us.

That said, I believe there is a way we can respect Mark the Evangelist’s gospel and the startling end to which he brings it while including within its sweep the alternative endings found in vss. 9-20. In order to do that, let us rewind the tape to the beginning of Mark’s gospel. The Evangelist opens his narrative with this stark announcement: “The beginning of the good news of Jesus Christ, the Son of God.” Mark 1:1. Granted, this “beginning” could refer to the ministry of John the Baptizer whose appearance comes immediately thereafter. But I think it just as likely that the “beginning” refers to the gospel as a whole. In other words, Mark’s entire narrative constitutes but the beginning of the good news. In this respect, Mark is consistent with the other three gospels. John’s gospel ends with the observation that “there are also many other things that Jesus did” and that “if every one of them were written down…. the world itself could not contain the books that would be written.” John 21:25. Luke writes a sequel to his gospel demonstrating that the good news of Jesus Christ continues through the ministry of his church. Matthew concludes with the promise that Jesus will be with his disciples to the end of the age. Matthew 28:20.

Mark points us into the future by inviting us to complete his narrative. Obviously, the women must have spoken up at some point. Obviously, the disciples must have been convinced by them to go to Galilee where they encountered the resurrected Christ. If the woman had remained forever silent, if the disciples had remained in hiding, we would not be reading Mark’s gospel. Can we read vss. 9-20 as faithful responses to Mark’s invitation to finish his story? And can we be encouraged by them to further develop the “Old, Old Story” with new episodes of encounters with the resurrected Christ in our own lives and ministries? Will we remain enslaved to our fears and doubts? Or will we find the courage to speak of what we have experienced and step out to meet Jesus where he has promised to meet us?

Here is a response to Jesus’ resurrection that further extends this good news into our literary present.

When Jesus early rose and breathed
The pungent air of new-dug earth,
Passed the stone, and passed the flesh,
Passed the mourners of his death,
(and left them dazed, but following)
He rose with such a limpid flight
As wind or wings could only clutter,
And left no scratches on the world,
No broken twig or parted cloud,
To draw our eyes away from him.

(c. 1972 by Joyce Hernandez) Joyce Hernandez is a teacher, nurse and poet living in Yakima, Washington whose publications include The Bone Woman Poems (c. 2009, pub. by Allied Arts and Minuteman Press). She is also, coincidentally, my sister.


[1] For those with a yen for conspiracy theories, the late Columbia University professor, Morton Smith’s book The Secret Gospel, provides an intriguing, if unpersuasive, explanation for Mark’s abrupt ending. His suggestion is that the gospel was abridged because it was too shocking and scandalous for the early church. You can read a thorough account of Morton’s book, his conclusions and the evidence with which he supports it in “The Secret Gospel,” an article in the Atlantic, April 2024.

The Passion and Profiles in Cowardice

PALM SUNDAY/SUNDAY OF THE PASSION

Processional Gospel: Mark 11:1-11 or

John 12:12-16

Isaiah 50:4-9a

Psalm 31:9-16

Philippians 2:5-11

Passion Gospel: Mark 14:1-15:47

Prayer of the Day: Everlasting God, in your endless love for the human race you sent our Lord Jesus Christ to take on our nature and to suffer death on the cross. In your mercy enable us to share in his obedience to your will and in the glorious victory of his resurrection, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and forever.

It was early afternoon on Valentine’s Day in 2018. Broward County sheriff’s deputy, Scot Peterson, was in his office at Marjory Stoneman Douglass High School. Peterson had spent most of his twenty-eight year career as a resource officer at a vocational school charged with enforcing safety procedures on campus and intervening as necessary when more than normal disciplinary action was required. Only rarely did he have to make an arrest and it appears that he was never required to use the gun he was authorized to carry. In 2010, he was transferred to Stoneman Douglass. Though the environment at Stoneman was more challenging in terms of requiring intervention, Peterson’s work involved chiefly dealing with student behavioral issues. He routinely, broke up fist fights, investigated claims of student drug possession, theft and bullying. Nothing in his career prepared him for what he was about to face on that fateful afternoon.

It was just after two in the afternoon that Peterson got a report over the school radio that there were “pops,” possibly fireworks, coming from a nearby building on campus. He climbed into a golf cart and headed toward the building with two other school employees. He arrived about three minutes later and, standing about ten feet from the door, heard a few more pops that he now suspected were gunshots. Switching on his radio, he entered a “code red.” By this time, Nikolas Cruz, a former student who had entered the campus with an AR-15 Assault rifle had already killed eleven students and wounded twelve others. Rather then enter the building, Peterson took cover behind a concrete wall at an adjacent building seventy-five feet away while Cruz killed six more students. He did not ever attempt to enter the building where the killings were taking place to confront the shooter.

Families of the Stoneman Douglass victims, the local community and, as the details of the massacre were reported nationwide, the American public excoriated Peterson. He was nicknamed, “Coward of Broward.” He was suspended from his position, criminally indicted and faced a barrage of civil actions for damages by relatives of the deceased and injured victims of the shooting. For days after the shooting, Peterson hid in his home seeking to avoid the persistent efforts of the press to question him and the expressions of anger by members of the community who sometimes gathered in front of the house. Ultimately, he moved into a cabin in the mountains of North Carolina accessed only by a dirt road. Though ultimately found not guilty in the criminal action, Peterson still faces several civil lawsuits. In the minds of most Americans, he remains an odious coward, a man who shrank from the call of duty and protected his own life at the expense of those with which he was entrusted.[1]

Why do I tell this story? Because it is also the story of the Church of Jesus Christ.  In addition to being Palm Sunday, this coming Sunday is the one on which many and perhaps most of our Lutheran Churches read through the full Passion narrative of our Lord’s arrest, trial and crucifixion. The following passages are of particular relevance here:

“When they had sung the hymn, they went out to the Mount of Olives. And Jesus said to them, ‘You will all become deserters; for it is written,
“I will strike the shepherd,
   and the sheep will be scattered.”
‘But after I am raised up, I will go before you to Galilee.’ Peter said to him, ‘Even though all become deserters, I will not.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Truly I tell you, this day, this very night, before the cock crows twice, you will deny me three times.’ But he said vehemently, ‘Even though I must die with you, I will not deny you.’ And all of them said the same.” Mark 14:26-31.    

We all know how that ended. All the disciples deserted Jesus and fled. Mark 14:50. Saint Peter followed Jesus from a safe distance-until he was questioned about his association with Jesus. Then he denied Jesus not once but three times and that with an oath. Mark 14:66-72. Thereafter, Peter broke down and wept. I suspect this weeping saint might have had a good deal more compassion and a great deal less condemnation for Scot Peterson than the American public. Peter knew first hand how, though the spirit be ever so willing, the flesh is week. Mark 14:38. Remarkably, this is the story we tell on ourselves each year at this time. It is a story in which our spiritual ancestors, the founding members of the church, do not come off well. There are no heroes of faith in the Passion narrative, only traders, deserters and cowards.  

There is a reason we pray “save us from the time of trial.” We would all like to believe that had we been with Jesus in the Garden or, for that matter, on the campus of Marjory Stoneman Douglass High School on Valentine’s Day 2018, we would have acted heroically. But honestly, can those of us who have never been tried, as were Saint Peter and Scot Peterson, know with any certainty how we would perform were we standing in their shoes? Can any of us know whether our willing spirits would be strong enough in the time of trial to master the weakness of our flesh and its powerful self-preservation instincts? Peter was confident that he had the wherewithal to make good on his promise to go with Jesus to prison or even death. He was wrong. He did not know himself half as well as he thought he did. I suspect that is probably true of us as well.  

As it turns out, the gospel of Jesus Christ is especially good news for cowards. We know that the Jesus who was betrayed, deserted and denied by his disciples and left to die alone, sought out these same cowardly disciples after his resurrection from death. He found them terrified and holed up behind locked doors-and proclaimed to them peace. Moreover, Jesus sent these same disciples who had failed him so profoundly out into the world to be his ambassadors of peace, reconciliation and forgiveness. Our God is the God of the second chance; the God who refuses to let us be defined by our failures, our defeats and our acts of cowardice. Our God is the one who sees in us more than we dare see in ourselves and challenges us to see our neighbors in the same way. As the Book of Acts testifies, Saint Peter’s act of cowardice did not determine his destiny. By the grace of God’s forgiveness and the power of God’s Holy Spirit, he became the bold witness of Jesus’ Resurrection to which he was called.  

That good word is what enables us to make a serious moral inventory of our own cowardice. It frees us to examine with a clear eye the ways in which we betray Jesus, by remaining silent in our pulpits when a contender for the highest office in our land refers to the stranger at our southern border as “animal” and “inhuman;” by failing to articulate in clear and unequivocal terms that LGBTQ+ folk and their families are fully welcome and accepted in all of our churches; by failing to address racist, sexist and homophobic remarks made within our families, in school or in the work place. Most important, the Passion narrative and the Resurrection story that follows remind us that Jesus continues to seek out his church as it cowers behind stained glass windows, entrenched in its bureaucracies and locked into its routine practices nursing its fears of decline, membership loss and irrelevance. After two millennia of cowardice stretching from the Garden of Gethsemane to the present, Jesus still entrusts his church with another chance to tell the world of its second chance.

Here is a poem about the kind of courage that is the antithesis of cowardice and suggestive of the sort called for in every day discipleship.

Some Notes On Courage

Think of a child who goes out
into the new neighborhood,
cap at an angle, and offers to lend
a baseball glove. He knows
how many traps there are–
his accent or his clothes, the club
already formed.
Think of a pregnant woman
whose first child died–
her history of blood.
Or your friend whose father
locked her in basements, closets,
cars. Now when she speaks
to strangers, she must have
all the windows open.
She forces herself indoors each day,
sheer will makes her climb the stairs.
And love. Imagine it. After all
those years in the circus, that last
bad fall when the net didn’t hold.
Think of the ladder to the wire,
spotlights moving as you move,
then how you used to see yourself
balanced on the shiny air.
Think of doing it again.

Source: Poetry, (January 1982). Susan Ludvigson (b. 1942) is an American poet. She was born in Rice Lake, Wisconsin to entrepreneur Howard Ludvigson and Mabel Helgeland. She entered the University of Wisconsin, River Falls in 1961 from which she earned a B.A. in English and psychology. She taught school in River Falls and in Ann Arbor, Michigan for seven years. In 1973 Ludvigson received an M.A. in English at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte. As an adult she became committed to poetry, publishing three volumes of verse. Ludvigson’s work has earned many awards, including Guggenheim and Fulbright Fellowships. You can read more about Susan Ludvigson and sample more of her poetry at the Poetry Foundation website.


[1] I am indebted to Jamie Thompson, author of Standoff: Race, Policing, and a Deadly Assault That Gripped a Nation, from whose excellent article in The Atlantic, (March 2024) entitled “American Cowardice” I gleaned the factual information concerning Scot Peterson’s role in the horrific Marjory Stoneman Douglass massacre. I strongly recommend this article as it provides a profound and nuanced view on the role of policing and its limitations with respect to preventing mass shootings.    

Is Original Sin Original?

FIFTH SUNDAY IN LENT

Jeremiah 31:31-34

Psalm 51:1-12 or

Psalm 119:9-16

Hebrews 5:5-10

John 12:20-33

Prayer of the Day: O God, with steadfast love you draw us to yourself, and in mercy you receive our prayers. Strengthen us to bring forth the fruits of the Spirit, that through life and death we may live in your Son, Jesus Christ, our Savior and Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and forever.

Indeed, I was born guilty, a sinner when my mother conceived me. Psalm 51:5.

A parishioner at one of my churches, a young woman with small children, once took me to task for the language in our Lutheran Order of Confession: “we confess that we are captive to sin and cannot free ourselves.” “I find that offensive,” she said. “And I think making children recite it amounts to child abuse. Do you even understand what effect that has on their self-esteem?” I was tempted to inform her that our present language is tame compared to the confession I recited in my own childhood, to effect that “we are by nature sinful and unclean” deserving only “temporal and eternal punishment.” Of course, I refrained and what followed was a spirited and fruitful discussion of original sin, what it does and does not mean.

Offensive as it may be, “original sin” is a central teaching of the church and the psalm for this Sunday confirms as much. That being said, I do not believe our preaching and teaching on the subject of original sin have always been clear and correct. Indeed, some of our past liturgical expressions are just plain wrong. For example, to claim as does the Service of the Word in the old Missouri Synod Lutheran Hymnal, that human beings are sinful “by nature” suggests that they are essentially evil. But that is not what the biblical witnesses tell us. Human beings are, after all, God’s creatures whose creation God proclaims to be “very good.” Genesis 1:31. However much we may have fallen away from the intention God has had for us since the beginning, we remain God’s creatures in a world God deems precious enough to send the only Son to save. Still, though essentially good, we are nonetheless, “captive to sin and cannot free ourselves.”

Admittedly, it is difficult to view a newborn as “sinful.” Nevertheless, if sin is understood as being hopelessly turned in upon oneself and so incapable of loving God or neighbor, the baby is a perfect specimen.[1] An infant does not care that mom is completely worn out from caring for it all day or that dad, who has been walking it back and forth till midnight and is due to begin a project at work the next day, is also wiped. When a baby wants to eat, drink or just be amused, that is the extent of its concern. Even the best of us never quite escape the orbit of this natural self-centeredness. Through socialization, we learn that it is often in our long term best interest to consider the interests of others, sometimes even at the expense of our own. But even this is arguably a self-interested calculation. Yet, as compelling as this observation concerning human nature may be, I do not think it fully captures what it means for us to be “captive to sin.”

In discussing original sin, Saint Augustine traces its origin back to Adam and Eve with their transgression in the Garden of Eden. Through that “original” sin the rest of humanity is infected. Like a malicious congenital disease, sin is transmitted from one generation to the next through the act of procreation. While I think Augustine’s understanding of sin’s transmission through the reproductive act is mistaken, I believe that he was onto something important. Even if we were to be born a blank slate, a tabula rasa, we could not stay that way for long. We are born into families that have been shaped, for better or worse, by religious traditions, social conventions, cultural assumptions and parenting styles. Woven in with and under all these things are social pathologies, racial prejudices, class distinctions, nationalist loyalties and family animosities that invariably influence our developments. As a parent, I know that I have passed on false assumptions and prejudices my children have had to unlearn. Well meaning as I surely was, I nevertheless injured them with parenting practices that proved to be misguided. I did all of that in large part because I was shaped by the flawed customs, beliefs and practices of my own family of origin and the community in which it was situated. I was born in captivity to sin and was unable to free myself-and I suspect, sadly, that the same is true for my children and grandchildren.

We protestants tend to think of sin strictly in individual terms. Righteousness, we think, is a personal struggle. If only I were courageous enough to act with integrity; if only I were compassionate enough to be sufficiently generous; if only I had the will power to control my lust-then I would be righteous. But hungering and thirsting for righteousness is not an individual quest and it is not something individuals can attain alone. For example, it is impossible for a judge to apply the law fairly and impartially when law enforcement arrests and brings before the court a disproportionate number of defendants of color. It is impossible for a police officer to enforce the law in a just manner when the law favors some groups at the expense of others. It is impossible for an employer to treat male and female employees equally when health insurers routinely discriminate against women in the provision of health care. It is impossible for a preacher to proclaim with conviction the gospel of Jesus Christ for all people in a church that has been complicit in the sins of a nation guilty of displacing indigenous people with genocidal violence, kidnapping and enslaving African peoples for centuries and which continues to practice racial, gender and class discrimination to this day. As it turns out, an individual can only be as righteous as the society in which the individual lives. We are, individually and collectively, captive to sin and cannot free ourselves.

The really good news we call gospel is that, while we cannot free ourselves from sin, God sets us free. That happens through forgiveness. I hasten to add that forgiveness is not God’s shrugging the divine shoulders and remarking, “Well, boys will be boys. What are you going to do?” Forgiveness is not resignation to captivity in sin. It is instead the breaking open of the prison doors. Forgiveness does not make living with sin any easier. To the contrary, the struggle against it becomes all the more intense because we now know that sin does not have to dominate. The past need not determine the future. The violent cycles of vengeance between nations, clans and tribes do not have to continue. Because sin is forgiven, we can stop trying to justify it, make excuses for it and resign ourselves to it. We can name it, confess it for what it is and move on from it. In short, we are free to repent. Repentance, it must be understood, is more gift than obligation.

I am thankful for the gift of repentance and for those who have helped me find it. I am thankful for my children who have helped me recognize my blind spots and smallness of mind. It is rewarding to see them raising their children and avoiding many of the mistakes I made in raising them. I am thankful for teachers, mentors and friends who have enabled me to see beyond my own limited understanding of salvation and view more clearly God’s redemptive purpose for all creation. I am thankful for authors, actors, artists and musicians in whose work I have been able to envision a better world and a better version of myself. Am I righteous? Not by a long shot. But I am what “twelve step” folks would call “a recovering sinner.” By God’s grace, I am recognizing my addictions, their power over me and, with the support of my fellow disciples, struggling to remain sober in a world increasingly drunk on power, wealth and privilege. That is, I believe, the call and challenge of Lent.

Here is a poem by Sharon Olds whose reflection on prejudice approximates what the church has named “original sin.”      

Addiction Sonnet

A prejudice is an addiction, and it’s

contagious—parents infect their children.

And addiction’s obsessive, if a man finds it

difficult to show his love to his

son, it may be because his father

escaped with his life from the village in which

his own father had just been murdered

in a pogrom, his model as a father

a man in terror.

But addiction to such a silence can be

healed, as Carl and his son tried to do,

through hard work. Workers of the world,

unite, we have nothing to lose

but the death of the earth.

Source: Poetry (April 2023). Sharon Olds (b. 1942) is an American poet. Olds won the first San Francisco Poetry Center Award in 1980, the 1984 National Book Critics Circle Award and the 2013 Pulitzer Prize for Poetry. She was raised in Berkley, California in what she describes as an abusive family. She characterizes her alcoholic father as a staunch Calvinist. The strict religious environment in which Olds was raised restricted her exposure to the outside world. Olds was not permitted to go to the movies. The family did not own a television. She was, however, a voracious reader. Olds was sent to Dana Hall School, an all-girls high school in Wellesley, Massachusetts where she studied English History and Creative Writing. She earned her BA at Stanford University in 1964 and her Ph.D in 1972 from Columbia University in New York. She currently teaches creative writing at New York University. You can read more about Sharon Olds and sample more of her poetry at the Poetry Foundation Website.


[1] The biblical words for “sin” have numerous shades of meaning. A thorough examination of the context is required to understand what the word signifies in any given text. That discussion, however, requires more than any single article of this kind can deliver.  

My Boring Testimony

FOURTH SUNDAY IN LENT

Numbers 21:4-9

Psalm 107:1-3, 17-22

Ephesians 2:1-10

John 3:14-21

Prayer of the Day: O God, rich in mercy, by the humiliation of your Son you lifted up this fallen world and rescued us from the hopelessness of death. Lead us into your light, that all our deeds may reflect your love, through Jesus Christ, our Savior and Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and forever.

“All of us once lived among them in the passions of our flesh, following the desires of flesh and senses, and we were by nature children of wrath, like everyone else. But God, who is rich in mercy, out of the great love with which he loved us even when we were dead through our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ-” Ephesians 2:3-4.

I remember well listening to Rev. Nadia Boltz Webber speaking at a nationwide youth event for my Evangelical Lutheran Church in America in July of 2012. She told a moving story about her life journey from addiction, poor choices and unhealthy relationships to redemption through faith. It reminded me of the many “testimonies” I heard in the years of my evangelical youth given by persons who had undergone dramatic conversions. They typically highlighted the process of transition from a life of unbelief and sinfulness to faith and salvation. They all testified of a distinct “before” and “after” life in Christ. It is hard not to be impressed by such powerful witnesses to the transformative power of God’s Spirit in such people’s lives.

Still, I find it hard to identify with these stories on a personal level. That is because, for me, there was no “before.” There was no time when I was “alienated from the life of God” and “abandoned….to licentiousness, greedy to practice every kind of impurity.” Ephesians 4:18-19. Child of the 60s and 70s though I was, I never did “sex, drugs and rock and roll.” I was what most would call a “straight arrow.” To be sure, there were times in my life, particularly my early teenage years, when faith, worship and prayer seemed less relevant. Nevertheless, if you had asked me at any point during those times whether I believed in God, trusted Jesus or identified as a Christian, my answer would have been an unqualified yes. There was never a time when I was not a believer, though, to be sure, there were times when I did (and do) not act that way. In sum, the totality of my life has been lived in the “after.”

I want to make it perfectly clear that I do not regard myself any less sinful than Rev. Boltz-Webber or any of the other testifying believers I have heard over the years. My sins are every bit as wicked as theirs. They are just less interesting. My life does not lend itself to dramatic testimony. I have nothing in the way of trauma of which to tell. I grew up in a stable home with two happily married parents. I was not abused as a child or young adult. I have my own very good marriage with three well adjusted and successful adult children. Throughout all of this, I have been blessed to be part of communities of faith that have nurtured and sustained me and my family. Make no mistake, I am profoundly grateful for these undeserved graces-and that is exactly what they are. I do not envy anyone’s “before.” Still, I cannot imagine this “testimony” of mine holding the attention of a stadium filled with teenagers. Who wants to listen to true confessions of laziness, envy, selfishness, carelessness and ungratefulness?

I find it much easier to identify with the children of Israel in our lesson from the Hebrew scriptures than with the Ephesian converts. Like me, they knew themselves as descendants of Abraham and Sarah from as far back as they could remember. Just as they followed Moses imperfectly, sometimes fearfully, often resentfully with plenty of doubts and questionings, so I have somehow managed, however imperfectly, to follow Jesus. Just as the people of Israel needed prodding, pushing, cajoling and a strong measure of “though love” to keep them on course to the Promised Land, so I have needed the discipline of loving parents, dedicated teachers and faithful pastors to show me the way of Jesus and restrain my most destructive impulses. I may be one of the ninety-nine sheep that did not stray. But that is due entirely to the tireless efforts of the Good Shepherd, not any inherent virtue of my own. By grace I have been saved from all that might have been, just as the strays have been saved from what was. Do not ask me why some of us feel the Shepherd’s rod reeling us back into the fold while others feel it barring us from wandering away. That is a matter well above my pay grade.  

I think that those of us who have never known a “before” have a particular need for Lenten discipline. That is because, for us, the “before” is so well hidden within our supposed “after.” Because we lead outwardly respectable lives, it is harder to see the many ways in which “the ruler of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work among those who are disobedient” is wreaking havoc and destruction in and through us. We need to be reminded that our addictions to wealth and privilege are as evil and more destructive than addiction to drugs and alcohol. We need a reminder that cruelty, dishonesty, selfishness and envy are no less sinful merely because they manage to stay on the near side of the law. Jesus came “not to call the righteous, but sinners.” Mark 2:17. Until we can recognize ourselves as sinners, we cannot hear his gracious call to discipleship.

Here is a Lenten poem by Lawrence Rhu inviting just such self reflection.

Lenten Confessional

Morning again made promises it broke

though foolish hope had led us to expect

something somewhat different when we woke.

Now news reports from far and near reflect

the shaking image of another day,

and seven deadly sins seem to control

the better part of everybody’s soul.

But what made hope plate golden common clay?

Start with yourself, like the wise moralist,

and detail the disasters of your ways;

then, after you’ve compiled a nice long list,

turn to the errors that our earth displays;

if you still find good reason to express

the glowing void that stalks your skipping heart

and finds its likeness in the supermart,

play prophet, only after you confess.

Regard the riot of your furious blood,

its circuiting and surge at such swift pace

that hectic rhythms rock your simple head

and bring bright colors to your civil face.

Why here’s an animal who could make war,

who might not even pause at rape or pillage,

cruel tortures or the burning of a village,

the daily news you properly deplore.

And yet, enraged, you lavishly complain

of wrongs that centuries have failed to right

while torrid humors cause each fluent vein

and spawn, in all that foment, fierce insight:

perhaps it’s evil bothers us, or pain,

or maybe the way we try to counter it

and manage such a pleasant counterfeit

we’re loosely labelled as the so-called sane.

But when you see the castaway and odd,

who nightly prowl the brilliant thoroughfare

in lonesome discourse with the vagrant crowd,

you slip past fast, then, from a distance, stare.

You hear them rant their lectures to the dark,

and at your stomach’s fretful squirm of doubt,

blush lest the crazed eyes’ flicker pick you out.

You sense a kinsman in a madman’s lark.

Maybe you ought to join that brotherhood

and finally reckon with the wretch you’ve well

concealed, and simply yielding to the blood,

allow the rapid pulse to rage and swell

and flood. You can play the prophet to the air.

Since Brother Francis even deemed the words

of God and Gospel message for the birds,

you’ve a likely soul to follow, if you care.

Or since you’ve looked within awhile and seen

a little, but enough, you should perhaps

now offer thanks and vow to curb your spleen.

Accept the blessing of a moment’s lapse

when hints and glimpses undermine all cant.

We’ll someday learn what mercy’s up against.

We’ll suffer gladly someday when we’ve sensed

the terrible pardon clear-eyed love can grant.

Source: Poetry, February 1975. Lawrence Rhu is the Todd Professor of the Italian Renaissance emeritus at the University of South Carolina. He has written books and essays about the American and European Renaissances, edited Shakespeare’s The Winter’s Tale for the Evans Shakespeare series from Cengage. His poems have appeared in numerous publications. In 2018-19, three of his poems received named awards from the Poetry Society of South Carolina and a fourth received the 2018 Faulkner-Wisdom Poetry Award from the Pirate’s Alley Faulkner Society in New Orleans.